eternal damnation (a sinner’s confession)

by the virgin terry

the man responsible for this blog has claimed repeatedly that he would gladly sacrifice his own life if only such an act could save our planet’s ecosphere from the condemnation that industrial civilization is in the process of bestowing upon it. i say ‘claimed’ because i’m a natural skeptic who can’t know for sure what’s in the mind of another being, and because i’m enough of an honest selfish lowlife to admit i’m not sure if i share such a sentiment, regardless of it’s obvious nobility. i’d like to think i share it, but when push comes to shove, i’m just not sure. after all, of what value is a magnificent world to one who doesn’t exist to appreciate it?! or, to put it another way, specifically in the way of a biblical quote i think is attributed to the mythical character of jesus christ: ‘for what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his own soul?’.

those of u familiar with the ways of the one and only ‘true’ church (according to it, of course), the roman catholic church, are familiar with the ‘sacrament’ of confession. supposedly it’s a way of cleansing the ‘soul’ of ‘sin’.

even now i must smh (shake my head) at how ‘the church’ has been so deservedly criticized for the infamous manner in which it has long facilitated and covered up the fact that many members of it’s clergy have abused their positions of ‘authority’ in sexually abusing children, while all along it has arguably been guilty of the much greater ‘sin’ of spiritually terrorizing every single one of it’s members/victims with it’s sick fear and shame based teaching that all humans are born with the stain of something called ‘original sin’, so that even newborns, according to this doctrine, are worthy of divine judgement and eternal damnation. along with this blanket condemnation, piled on top of it, is the teaching that every single little lie one commits, every single ‘impure thought’ (be ashamed of being a sexual animal!), is a ‘sin’ for which one must answer to god for, repent, and endlessly strive towards becoming the sort of ‘perfect’ being that the mythical christ was, and for which god will accept no less. the idea being that while of course one will never attain such ‘perfection’, as long as one believes in the myth and feels genuine ‘repentence’ (shame!) for being a ‘fallen sinner’ for the rest of one’s ‘mortal’ life, one may magnanimously be granted ‘forgiveness’ and thus escape the deserved fate of every ‘filthy’ ‘sinner’: eternal damnation. that bears repeating in all caps i think: ETERNAL DAMNATION!

like the comic george carlin (also raised catholic), upon attaining the adult ability to think and reason for myself, i rejected my catholic indoctrination, intellectually, but that doesn’t mean i got over it. i’ve never gotten over it, and never will, for ‘innocence’ once stolen, is forever lost. if nothing else, it left a profound and indelible impression of the sort of ‘world’ i’d been born into. that being an insane world in which ‘authorities’ promote psychologically crippling fear and shame inducing dogmas, all in the name of ‘truth’ and ‘morality’. all for the ultimate purpose, i now suspect, of turning children into sheeple who may be more easily deceived and manipulated for the rest of their ‘mortal’ lives.

in summary, my confession is this: i feel more resentment for having been taught a pack of psychologically crippling bullshit lies that stole my ‘innocence’, than i do for the fact that our species has collectively, over time, behaved like a disease, like a cancer, an ecological cancer that now threatens/(promises?!) to be responsible for bringing about the greatest mass extinction event in our planet’s history. in other words, i value my own pitiful little existence over that of all ‘creation! i grieve more for the loss of self than i do for the loss of something infinitely greater.

SIGH.

how ironic it is, now that i no longer believe that i will go to hell for my ‘sins’, that i now know that the ‘sins’ of homo sapiens shall bring about the eternal extinction of countless wondrous species. it seems as though eternal damnation of a sort does exist, after all! i can only hope that when i die, the fear and shame of this human experience shall be eternally ended, like a forgotten nightmare, just a bad dream.

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McPherson was interviewed by Cheri Roberts last night. It’s archived here, with the interview beginning about 35 minutes into the hour-long show.